That’s not my name!

This morning, John suggested I change my name.

As in change my ‘official’ name to be my ‘girl’ name.

He felt it’d be a good milestone in my transition. I haven’t really decided what’s next on the list and this would sure be a step forward.

It’s a tricky one though, it really is…

Part of me would love to do this. Become Jen officially, start to present as a girl first and foremost rather than a boy who sometimes does this girly thing.

I’m also still on the waiting list for the Gender Identity Clinic. When I get my first appointment I expect it would be much better to go in with ‘Jennifer’ written on the top of my medical records, I do want to be taken seriously after all.

So what’s stopping me? Well, the name Jennifer is definitely female. I don’t have one of those boy names like Sam or Alex that could be either gender. This means that in future, if I changed my name to Jennifer, whenever someone asked me my name (in an official capacity) that is what I would have to reply. At the moment my confidence is still quite up and down, I tend to maintain an androgynous appearance most of the time and wouldn’t expect people I pass in the street to think I was female.

Plus I’ve never really concentrated on how my voice sounds, maybe if I had that sorted a bit more then saying “Jennifer” to the man in the bank wouldn’t seem so crazy in my head.

So why not change my name to a more androgynous one I hear you ask?

I’m not sure that would help to be honest, seems like a bit of a cop out.
I am Jen after all!

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